My Body Betrayed Me (A Preemie Mom’s Journey)

My Body Betrayed Me

You had one job

The job you were designed and made for

To carry my little one the necessary 40 weeks

You could do it

With absolutely no medical care

But we had it

And every doctor’s visit you performed to perfection

You were ready to carry my greatest gift

You were in perfect mom to be condition

But then

On that cool spring day while my guard was laid down

You betrayed me

You weakened

You went AWOL

You threw my baby out!

And I am angry with you

One job, the most important

To help us become a mommy

To allow my first born to grow

My heart and soul were all in

They showed up and loved without measure

But you

You

You hid your inability until

There was nothing we could do but

DELIVER

Even when you did not…

Part of me will never trust you with this again

I will second guess you

And think twice about placing my precious gift in you again

I’ll have to pay more attention to you

Place less faith in my womb

I just can’t let you ever

Ever

Betray me, or my child

Again

from the book Stronger Than We Thought: Poetry for the Preemie Mom’s Journey